Why do people insist on forcing children to apologize? Aren't apologies supposed to be heartfelt and meaningful for the one apologizing and the one offended? The child, like any other human being, is supposed to "feel" apologetic. And to do that, they have to be aware of what they did wrong, why it was wrong and the consequences their actions. Not being cognizant of the ramifications of their actions will only result in an repeat offense. IMHO, the child will repeat the same offense but will be sure to not get caught the second time being as though they were forced to apologize when they weren't sorry. Apologies are supposed to evince true feelings of penance and personal responsibility and accountability. A forced apology is not an apology.
Forcing your child to issue empty apologies is a sure-fire way to assist them in being socially challenged and to keeps them out of touch of their true feelings. Could this be the reason why adults are so hesitant to apologize in later years even when they are genuinely "sorry"? Hmm....
It seems that way to me. I know as a child, when I was forced to apologize, I would say "
I'm Sorry" real snappy or wait for my mom to turn around before sticking my tongue out at the offended just before rolling my eyes. I was sorry that I got caught but definately not for the feelings I exasperated. I wasn't aware of it. I was enabled into feeling so. Thank the heavens, now I know better.
//signed//
The Apologetic Cat's Meow
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