NOT MR. LIFETIME

One problem we, as women have, is that we all too often stick around, stay round or pray around waiting for HIM to come around. We arrest our poor souls in hopes that he will change his mind about how he feels about us. Newsflash: People are who they are and love who they love. A tiger doesn't change his stripes. Sometimes we have a tendency to believe "he'll come around' or "he's just saying that he doesn't want a relationship b/c he's scared." Or try this one, "he's being this way because he's been hurt before." What makes it even worse is that our 'friends' will agree with our foolery. Well, do they really agree or just merely saying this as to not abuse and tamper with our emotions being as though we are in a fragile state at the moment? Subjecting someone with the responsibility of our happiness only makes us object ourselves. Who are you to put your happiness on hold? And just who are you to force your happiness upon someone else? I've seen women hold on to 'relationships' for YEARS in hopes of their 'boo' finally wanting to tie the knot, in hopes of him eventually saying "I love you" or ultimately agreeing to "be together". Trust me, I know. I've been there, done that AND bought the T-shirt only to see it was the WRONG SIZE Honey! If he ain't boo'd ya up in your first couple of years of marriage, why the hell would you give more years to NOT boo ya up?

People, especially men, will do what they want. If they wanna cheat...they will find a way. If they wanna watch the ball game...they will. If they wanna say I love you....they do. If they want your number and you are across the street....they will run a light, cut off the police or hold up traffic just to get the 10 telephonic digits that will connect them to YOU. Trust me I know, it just happened to me Saturday. They are not like us; emotional, analytical and sensitive. They do shit half the time just cuz! “Those that don't got it, can't show it. Those that got it, can't hide it.” ~Zora Neale Hurston. If he wansta boo ya up....he will. If he wansta say I love you...he'll say it. If he wants you in his life forever...nothing can stop him. Not rain, not sleet, not snow, not fear, not distance, not his past relationships, his mama 'nem nor his dog and definitely not his boys will keep him from treating you like HIS queen, his partner, his mate, his ace-boon-coon or the one who completes him. What we have to realize is that it's ok. It doesn't mean you're a failure if you walk away. It doesn't mean you are incapable of being loved if he (or she) is unable to do it. It doesn't mean you are not a jewel if he (or she) doesn't see your light. It means HE AINT THE ONE! 

If I've said it once I've said it 1000 times. Each person is in our our life for a reason, season or a lifetime. Stop trying to expand that one reason or migrate a season into a lifetime. YOU WILL FAIL! You can't fit a square block into a triangular mold. Ya just can't Cletis!  I don't know how many times I've "stuck around til he comes around" only to find out that he'll sooner not 'be around' in the first place. What has he lost but this here dime piece of a woman? NOTHING! What have I lost? I've lost time, patience, effort, emotion, possibly the one FOR me, myself and quite a bit of weight in the process. If you don't know math and is just pretty like me, you may not have calculated that I've lost more then he for I've lost me. And the nerve of us tryna up and get mad cuz HE didn't realize what he had? Ha! That's ok. A lot of us will get bitten in the face by an alligator that we didn't see swimming right in front of us. It means it was meant for us to see. He is merely a passerby. Don't get mad at him cuz he knows when the jig is up.  He was a reason or a season NOT Mr. Lifetime.

 If you had a baby by him and all of a sudden your 'love grows cold' with each other then guess what? Maybe he was a REASON. That reason was to bring forth that beautiful child. A child brings loved ones together, not create love where there is none. Quit harping that "I want my child to have both parents" song. That is bullshit and you know it! A lot of us (well not me cuz I'm allergic to kids) try to pull that 'its for the children' crap but I know better than that. You want HIM to stay for YOU! You aint fooling nobody Miss Thang but ya self. How dare you subordinate that child to witness the unhappiness of both parents cuz you can bare to let it go? Cuz you can't give up your live-in dick? Cuz you're too lazy, scarred and lack confidence in yourself to walk away. Get some SELF-esteem aboutcha, not some HIS-esteem Bish! Get it togetha! Why be complacent when you can be happy? You have got shit to do, a life to live, places to see and shit to learn to be giving someone all of ya good years in hopes of him 'coming around'. When will we ever learn? I'm glad I have. Have you?


You don't have to start over, just begin again. 
//signed//
The 'Learnt' Cat's Meow