Intimidation is Intimidating Part I

It is lonely being intimidating. Soon, you begin to think something is wrong with YOU. ~Elvadaseleithia

Well you do! At least I do and I have a feeling that I’m not alone in these thoughts, with these thoughts. I remember back in the day as a young Diva with very little aspirations (besides having my own sitcom and all girls school), a body to die for (I still do), not a care in the world and very little education. I didn’t talk much, kept my opinions to myself, was always lady-like, didn’t smoke or drink and would cry at the drop of a cat’s piss. I’d believe anything you say, believed in what you did and felt everyone in the world was about “some good”. Guys would flock to my feet, more often than not, and a few would actually call me. Though it wasn’t a LOT of dates, there were more than few. I mean, they still shied away from this Southern-Gal-Preacher’s Kid but I wasn’t too much bothered by it. I was still finding myself anyway so being bogged down with too many dates would’ve only interrupted the process.

Fast-forward to the present: I know who I am and what I am (see intro above if u don’t) and I love it.  I know what I like and what I will tolerate. I have an extensive educational background, my own business (it aint a Fortune 500 but it's mine) and working on a second plus inventions, I live alone; I don’t have children or a pet. I buy my own shit, do my own thing, answer to no one, have the bestest friends anyone could have & talk to my parents on the regular especially my perfect daddy. I come home when I please, wear what I want when I want and best believe I do it with class. I’m vocal, opinionated and I get answers. I have an impeccable sense of style, walk with my head up, and love community service & the stage. I even go to sleep when I want. But the problem lies in waking up alone…everyday…..for at least six years…well almost 10. We won’t begin to mention the celibacy part. What is the deal? Yeah, yeah I know you may say the same things that a lot of other people are saying, “Diva, you’re just too intimidating.” I call Bullshit for 200 Alex! There is not that much intimidation in the world. When I think of intimidation (tho nuffin really intimidates me…IJS), I think of a CEO or COO with a lotta bank in the tank, fully high powered and will take no trash…not even in her kitchen. One that’s a beast in the bedroom and the board room (am I describing myself? LOL ) with gorgeousness to boot. One that is a cougar, drives a Jaguar, wears a mink and knows Tiger……Woods that is. I mean a la’ Michelle Obama, Tyra Banks or the Great Lady O (Winfrey). I am nothing like this! Don’t get it twisted, I still walk around on tissue for I am the shit but I don’t feel I have anything or am anything intimidating. I mean, I wouldn’t scare ME. I am, however, a force to be reckoned with. I have a high tolerance for things but little tolerance for less. I won’t let you piss down my back and tell me it’s raining but I will listen to you if you tell me it’s thundering outside. I carry myself with pride naturally. It is not to scare anyone off. I’m opinionated because I have a lot to say. It is mostly profound (to me anyway) and my mind and heart can’t hold it all, not because I think I’m the boss and what I say goes. I’m not rich by any stretch of the imagination but a bish ain’t homeless, car-less, have a lack of fashion and can eat a steak 3 times a week if I so desire. I don’t relish in the attitude of Diva but I do have the Diva Attitude and trust me there is a difference.  It’s not to intimidate, ward people off or portray a bad ass. It is what it is (and I hate that saying).

Again, don’t get me wrong. Women like to hear that they are intimidating in some aspect. This usually means they are dealing with a buncha pussies (I hate that word 2). My friend Torrey says that I’m just dealing with a bunch of weak asses but damn Torrey, EVERY MAN can’t be weak! I ain’t that strong! Or am I? Where the hell is the middle? If 1 person says you look like a horse you tell them to kiss your ass. If a 2^nd person say it, you would think they need glasses, a 3^rd you may begin to slightly wonder but if a 6^th person says it, wouldn’t you think it’s time to visit Dr. 90210? I mean really, all six of these folks can’t be blind and they all aren’t just a lover of that loyal mammal.  At first I thought that maybe I’m just being a little too impatient but wtf? I can only be patient for so long! Now don’t go into the spill about ‘you must first love yourself before you can love anyone else’. STFU! I love myself, have always loved myself and will continue to myself. When will someone else take the hell over? It aint that hard but shit I am tired! It seems that Intimidation is Intimidating me:(

//signed//
The Cat's Purr