Tuesday, September 9, 2014

The Nerve of Fools!

You know what chaps my hide (you’re probably asking what does NOT chap my hide but so!)--- Societal thinking?! Why do people insist on living in the archaic time? I have a tendency to believe that they want to have such thoughts simply because they don’t WISH to think otherwise.
One question I’m referring to is when people, especially men, ask any woman in scrubs or a white coat (duh) if they are a nurse. If they see that any female that works in a medical treatment facility they automatically assume she changes bedpans or answer to some male counterpart with the MD behind his name. Why are people choosing to think this way? Do they feel that this is a challenge to MALEhood  cuz surely women have legally and scholastically been holding medical degrees since 1849 beginning with Dr. Elizabeth Blackwell. Don’t act brand-damn-new! You know good and well there are more female doctors than male doctors even though research shows that they are still making $50,000 less then their male counterparts even in positions of the upper echelons but hey that’s another blog entry. Secondly, don’t show your ignorance. You know for Pete’s sake (whoever he is) that nurses do NOT wear white coats you ‘tard! At least –PRETEND like you have your wits about you! Show some darn respect for people’s job. If you don’t know just ask and do come outta your trap with a dumb ass question!
 
This reminds me of when I donned that great American governmental-fatigued uniform. When one find out me or anyone of my friends served in the US Air Force the first dumbass question from their pie hole would be, “Do you fly planes?” Really fuqwad!? I swear I see why some civilians wouldn’t make it past the first question on the ASVAB: What is your name? SMH Oh the level of ignorance. NO! We don’t all get up at 3am! NO! Everyone in the Air Force doesn’t fly planes! These are the people I normally cock my eyes at and give the rudest answer possible! THINK you moron! Its simple! I don’t want to hear the excuse of “I didn’t know” or “I was just curious.” Often times, one can answer their own questions simply by using the cognitive skills given them. This is why I disagree that there are no stupid questions. BULLSHIT! Yes there are! Another example is when my troop and I went out for lunch. She was in uniform and about 7 months preggers when some voluntarily mentally challenged moron asked, “Wow, you can be pregnant in the military?” I responded with, “No this is her last meal before she is burned at the stake for doing something that is apart of human nature! Now GTFOH! What the hell do you think happens—they sterilize all of the women or something? Clearly you couldn’t pass the ASVAB!” ugh! Say what you wish but we really hate dumb questions as does anyone but we strongly hate those same dumb questions that everyone asks! At least be creative and ask something no one else has! To help yall out here is a list of shit not to ask us and answers you may get if you ask the RIGHT veteran:
 
1. So, how WAS Iraq?
It was paradise getting shot at and all and I hope do it again soon, thanks for asking.
2. Did you like… have to go to Iraq?
No I had a choice, it’s called “Go to war or go to jail”.
3. Did you kill anybody?
Of course! Babies, puppies, you name it, I’ve killed it!
4. Did you shoot anybody?
See above.
5. Did they(The Army) train you before sending you out to war?
No, they just handed us guns and said “Get the Hajis!”
6. Were you scared?
Of course I freaking was, stop asking dumb questions.
7. Did they give you REAL guns?
Nah, we were just playing a big game of laser tag with the insurgents. The BEST part is you can reset when you die, awesome right?
9. Did you lose any buddies over there?
WOW! I personally never had the “PLEASURE” of losing a buddy over there. But please do not ask this question to another veteran.
10. Who are the insurgents fighting over there?
Hell if I know, people that shoot at us.
11. Did you ever get shot at?
Nope, and if I did, I was either asleep in the turret or don’t remember.
12. What you guys EAT over there?
Scorpions, shish kabobs, sand, etc. No seriously man, we ate AMERICAN food, it ain’t like Hollywood, we don’t live off the wild.
15. Oh, you went to Iraq, my friend “so & so” went there also. Did you know him?
Yeah, yeah! I know him… amongst the thousands of OTHER soldiers that are there, in fact, we’re freaking bunk mates!
Bonus Question: How has going to Iraq impacted your life?
*crickets chirp*
1. Oh dude, Iraq? Was it hot??
No way man, its just the desert!
2. But you were never in any REAL danger, right? (To female vets)
No, the Army let me and my vagina lives in a protective bubble. Obviously, some people don’t watch current events! At least 100 women have died in combat! Stay your ass off of Facebook and Instagram and watch some darn CNN or something!
 
Think for your darn-self! This maybe hard considering the way we use our brain cells up on unnecessary things these days but if you try really hard, you can answer your own damn question!
 
When did fools get such nerve?! Hmph I don't know, hell, I'm Just Elle...

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